Secret # 4: Connecting at a Heart Level Beats the IQ

| February 1, 2012 | 0 Comments

Number 4 in this series of 10 secrets to lead a fulfilled and successful life is about connecting at a heart level. Modern day life is dominated by technology and information. Our head is ON all the time. Thousands of thoughts go through our mind every day. Our intellect is sharpened, fast and awesome. With some decisions, however, we seem to be getting nowhere. Having a chance for a great promotion and not being able to bring your self to step up to the plate?

Sometimes we are just stuck. Logic tells us to decide in favor of one thing, but a bugging feeling keeps us stalling, without being able to put our finger on it. The big decisions in life are best made with a connection to the heart. The heart seems to know so much more than our mind.

Our mind does linear thinking: if A happens, B follows and so on. But big decisions – like should we sell our house – are so complex with so many, often too many factors involved. Our mind is overwhelmed. But if we take a pause and connect to the quiet and still place in our heart, we can ask the big questions and wait. If we are willing to listen inside ourselves, observe the feelings coming up, and to notice where in the body we get sensations, we come to a place of knowing. All of a sudden we just know what we are going to do.

This is the time to commit to the decision and not let it be torn to pieces by the worrying and suspicious mind. The mind is scattered, because it cannot fathom the big problem. Connect to the peace of the knowing and connect to the trust and faith inside of you. That said, this has nothing to do with going about things blindly. Once you made your decision in your heart, you start with going towards it, putting in the legwork.

That´s where the mind comes in handy again. I once heard, “The mind is a wonderful servant, but a terrible master.” I find that to be true, especially during a sleepless night, when the mind takes over and tortures me with the most unlikely and tiniest of details about what might go wrong 20 years hence.

Whenever you notice that your mind is in charge and your worry-loop has gone on eternal mode, just say to yourself “Thank you for sharing.” Then take charge again and choose to believe that things will work out, and start focusing on one thing you can do right NOW in order to improve your situation. Sometimes it is as little as acknowledging that there is nothing to do right now (e. g. at 3 a.m.), and that all you need is to take care of your body and nourish it well, give it rest and relaxation.

Worrying weakens you, taking charge empowers you – no matter how little the step is, it is always better than spending energy on worrying, which is getting nowhere.

For this month, start paying attention to that first hunch that we get when confronted with a new situation/decision. This is your heart speaking. We are used to automatically let our mind make the decision. It works well with somewhat little decisions, but the big gain from listening to your heart is that it makes you happy and fulfilled.

Logic does not take into consideration the unique person you are. Logic is neutral. Your heart wants you to be happy. And we all know that there are things that make us happy that make absolutely no sense to our mind (I always rejoice when I see tulips, roses don’t have quite that effect on me). Enjoy and celebrate your life. More about this topic and the 10 Secrets in the book “Simply This…” Comments are welcome:

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Certified Life Coach